Tuesday, May 7, 2013

I'm the bad guy.

So...when I don't know what picture to add you can tell that means I just do a random picture of my face. And here we are, another picture of my face. Cause, it's my blog! And I want my kids to look back and know what I looked like at whatever age, ya know? Why am I explaining this?....
ANYWAYS. For basically our whole marriage, Chad and I have taken on different roles. He, from the start took on the budget role. He'd pretty much design it, show me, I'd give it an "ok" and then there you go. I'd be the one calling or texting him "hey, do we have enough money in the account for _______" and he would feel like a dad to or the bad guy for saying yes/no (which he hated). And it just was not cool for him. And it wasn't cool of me for NOT taking the time to check out accounts, knowing what and when bills come out...ya know, that not fun stuff to stop your day and look up? 

So our system was flawed and annoying but has kind of worked the 7+ years we've been married.

For the past while for some reason, it just has not been working? Not quite sure why, but we actually over drafted a couple times? Oops. So logically this stressed Chad out, like, majorly. 
I have said about a million times, "lets just assign a night a week where we go over budget together and be on the same page" it sounds good when I say it, but for some reason NEVER HAPPENS. 

So long story short, we have changed roles. I am head of the budget. And I must say, it feels good. Maybe I am a closet control-freak? I just like being in charge of this. (See how long this lasts?). But I think what it took for things to get set straight was for me to be in charge, to been keenly aware of where money is, and how much and boom the magic happens. And maybe I like being the bad guy? Who knows.

Wish us (me) luck.
How do you handle budget in your life? 
Share the role, one person...ya know, how do different people do it?


JDS said...

Good Luck! Mark and I share. I use a smaller account to pay the day to day bills (utility, grocery, date night, etc) but he manages the bigger/long term bills (student loans, mortgage, car payment, etc). He automatically withdraws those big payments from his check into his account and I'm left to balance the weekly ups and downs in the other.

Southern Belle said...

I do it all. I am just kind of controlling like that, but I know exactly how it feels to be the bad guy!! Bah! I hate it! Anytime I want something, Jeff says, "Just get it!" And I want him to say, "no we can't afford it." Then when he wants something and I have to say no I feel like a total b! I wish we could somehow share the duties, but I wouldn't know how to split it up. I have a routine so down, I have to know every penny that goes in and out, so it seems like it would be so confusing to share it... But, I did see on the Suze Orman show that both partners should share the duties and always know what is going on financially, otherwise it is too much stress for the one person to handle on their own. Good luck taking charge! It is fun kind of, but really stressful at the same time, especially if you overdraw or forget to pay a bill!!!

Laura said...

My husband and I budget together at the end of every month, inpreparation for the next month. We us ethe Dave Ramsey cash enveelope system. This way we are both aware of our finances. He is in chsrge of making sure certain bills gets paid, and I am in charge of making sure others get paid. And since I am the one who stays at home, im prettt much in charge of going ti the bank to withdraw or deposit money, etc. It has worked great for the during our 4 1/2 years of marriagw so far. Money is ine thing we hardly ever argue about bc we both know what is going on.

Laura said...

I promise I know how to spell! Haha. Im on my phone and wasnt paying enough attention to which letters were being pressed I guess.

Tif said...

Have you met John? I would much rather have him budget than me. I'm good at the small picture. He's better at the big picture-the 20 year plan...which totally overwhelms me! So he sets the budget, tells me any changes in it each month, and I have an app on my phone that is a virtual envelope app, We load the certain amounts of money into each envelope and then through the month I track groceries, gas, medical, etc and watch the envelopes get emptier and emptier! I don't really ever ask him if we have enough money for XYZ...except the new sofa I bought last week. That sort of thing. Because if my envelopes are empty...they're empty!

Janell said...

We do the Dave Ramsey cash system for any "usual" spending as well. Just like others have mentioned... when the moneys gone it's gone. We've determined our usual spending categories and associated a dollar amount to those categories. The dollar amount usually stays the same from week to week for us, but occasionally we have to adjust depending what might be going on that week. For bills we have a joint account that all bills get paid out of, so we are never short on money for bills. We don't have any sort of debit card attached to this account, so we can't spend against it... strictly setup as auto pay. The nice thing we do with the cash system is we each get what we call "fun" money. This money is ours to spend however we want. We don't have to ask the other person, we just do it. So far it has worked amazingly well for us. We've saved more money in the past 10 months or so doing this than we have the rest of the time we've been together. We were even able to pay for our Hawaii tickets in cash!