So I dont get it, Lily is throwing me all out of whack and changing her schedule around on me again...oh the phases. she is taking awesomely long naps until noon and then we go for a long walk, in the front pack (which she TOTALLY loves) as you can see below, and then is awake until like 6:30 or 7:00 and out for the night...where did the other nap go??? cause she is now up at 5am and ready for the day...so im not liking this whole one big nap and bed early thingy. she is kinda fussy for that long stretch of time from nap to bed time but for the most party pretty happy. I get so frustrated cause i feel like im the 22 year old, shes the 7 month old...i should have the control here! but every time i get her close to being asleep she wakes up and is totally awake, like laughing squealing...all the usual. any advice moms? how much do i fight it and let her cry and how much to i let go and let her play? i dont know the line here.
this is her while i was cooking dinner, you cant tell really in this pic, but she was basically hanging over the side just smiling and laughing at me...i mean how can i stay frustrated at that??
8 comments:
Hey Rachel,
For what it's worth, being a first time mom and all...
The way I see it my baby is only a baby for so long. I think the whole "schedule your baby" is a load of crock, in fact I think it's super cruel. Your baby knows when she is sleepy, she knows when she is hungry, when she wants to play... how cool is that? So with Stella, I decided that if she was getting enough sleep, so was I. And if I WASN'T getting enough sleep, I'd figure out a way to get in some extra zzz's while she either napped or played. These little phases do not last long at all, and before you know it she'll be in a more easy-to-cope-with swing of things. Stella, honestly, only does things like wake up at 5 am for a week or two at a time. It's important for kids to understand that we are the parents here and that we do have a routine, routines are really important. But there is nothing you can do to force a kid to sleep, and there is no valid reason for it (in my humble opinion, haha!)
So as President Hinckley would say, "Enjoy the ride" it'll get easier and less frustrating. Where Stella is now is by far the most enjoyable, she naps short in teh morning, long in the afternoon, goes to bed by 10 and sleeps until 7!! It's wonderful and I'm so grateful, but I'm prepared for her perfect schedule to change yet again as she keeps growing. Just for the record, this kind of "parenting" has worked awesomely for us, and Stella is so smart. Times when she wakes up early are great opportunities to read with her, teach her about new foods, or how to obey (stella is learning the meaning of "no" "drop" and "stay" and then of course she's thrilled when she hears "you are such a good baby! we love you so much!" it's adorable!). Sorry for the novel, I don't even know if any of that is helpful or not. Just keep doign what feels right for you two, and you'll do great, because it really is different for everyone.
Rach. I totally know what you mean. Cam went through a phase like that. It's your decision as a mom what to do, but I'll tell you what we do. Right now, Camden gets 1-2 naps during the day. Most of the time they don't exceed an hour. Thats all he needs. He goes to be between 8 and 9 and wakes up between 7 and 8. He might wake up once in the night if he's cold, but if we cover him he is fine.
I was going nuts when Camden was a bit younger, because I wasn't getting any sleep and couldn't handle it. And camden wouldn't sleep unless he was being held. So, we let him cry. It took about 4-5 days of him crying for about 20 minutes the first night and then it slower decreased. Now he goes to bed just fine, even if we put him down awake. He will look at us and go to bed. If he is sick then I really baby him. And sometimes I take naps with him, because it's true, he won't be a baby forever. But we take short naps. If I let him take long naps, he wakes up 5-10 times at night crying. So, he either gets one semi-long nap or 2 short naps. Also, the 2 shorter naps helps him get through the get in the afternoon before bedtime. It helps me and Tyler and Camden does SO much better. If we let him, he would sleep all day and stay up all night, because that's how I am, but it's better for all if he just gets short naps. And he's happy. He's always happy...hope this makes sense and helps!!
ps yes sometimes we let stella cry too- you can tell when it is a frustrated that she's sleepy cry or a i actually need something cry... especially at her age i don't see anything wrong with letting her fuss a bit... it makes 'em sleep longer, too! haha :)
That's a tough one. Kaylin took 3 naps up until she was pretty much one. Then she took 2 until 17 or 18 months and now she's down to one. I guess it really depends on the kid and whether or not they're tired. I do "make" her nap in the afternoon, even if she doesn't want to. The other day it took her so long to fall asleep that when I went in to try to make her lie down again she told me that she was hungry, so I got her up, fed her a snack, and put her back down. Usually at nap time I put on a lullaby cd and let her have a book to look at and that helps. I don't know if a toy or book or something would help Lily or not. Anyway, I agree with your friend Carly that it's probably just a phase and it should pass soon. Oh, one more thing, when I had my surgery I needed more sleep during the afternoon and when K woke up after 1-2 hours I made her lay back down and then she would sleep for another 1-2 hours (total of 3). After a couple of days of that she just always slept for 3 hours for a couple of months. The point of that story is that you can work with them (if they let you :-)). Good luck!
Kyla went through a similar stage but there was no WAY I was going to let her start getting up at 5 or 6. I don't function with little sleep and I'm not a morning person so I kind made her sleep in at least another hour. haha. Anyway, she was also transitioning to the 1 nap bit. We knew she was sleeping too much in the day because at her regular bedtime she would not go to sleep at all so anyway... Here's what we did that worked for her: Whether she woke up really early and wouldn't go back to sleep, or she slept in a little bit (we tried to get her to go back to sleep in the mornings and sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't), then we just kept her up until about 1pm when we'd give her a nap. We kind of stuck to the same nap time for a couple weeks and eventually she adjusted. She took a 2-3 hour nap and then went to bed about 9 and woke up in the morning about 7. It totally depends on the kid though in all honesty. My sister in laws kids who are Kyla's age need at least a 3 hour nap and 11 or 12 hours of sleep at night. Anyway, like the others were saying, do whatever you feel is right for you and for little Lily! You're the best one to decide what to do! :) Good luck!
Everyone has advice but being the mom to two boys what I've learned is this, every child is different and that mom knows best!
But, I have had so many times that I have felt like who's the boss? This little person or me and it's usually the little person!!
Oh well!
April
I keep discovering (over and over) that schedules change CONSTANTLY! One week I think I've got her figured out and the next week we're on to something new. I refer to this website a lot when it comes to sleep: http://www.babycenter.com/0_how-much-sleep-does-your-child-need_7645.bc. I figure it's an average of children in general and if we are close to average then we're good. :) Also, I figuer if she is getting enough total sleep then it doesn't matter as much when she sleeps. We also let her cry some. It's tough but crying doesn't always mean pain. She just misses you and knows how to get you back to be with her! :) But then again, they're only babies for a short time so we are definitely guilty of falling for those cries! Good luck! And if you figure this whole thing out, let us know so we will know what to do!
I don't have any new advice, but I completely empathize with you. People will ask about Sophie's "schedule" and all I can say is, "This is what she is doing now. It'll probably change tomorrow." Just be flexible.
PS Thanks for finding us!
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